better together

Dear Diego,

I thought time went by too quickly during your first year and here it’s gone doubly fast during your second. You’ve gone from being my big baby to my little boy in the last 12 months and you are truly an independent little being at this point. I have so many things to reminisce about over the last year that I don’t know where to begin… You’ve gone from uttering a few garbled words beyond Mama and Dada to full sentences and you look at us with exasperation when we don’t understand exactly what you’re trying to tell us. Your steps were tentative and slow 12 months ago and now you run, sometimes leaping just for the fun of it, with reckless abandon. You were completely dependent on us 12 months ago and now you don’t even look back when running off to join your friends. And what great friends you have made this year! Jacob, 4 months your senior, is the guy you look up to. You’ll follow him anywhere. Although your personalities are different – Jacob has a pensive way about him and thoroughly thinks through his next action before making a move. You, on the other hand, are quite reckless and jump right in even when you are literally “in over your head”. That being said, you listen to Jacob and will often follow his lead. I think he will likely be the voice of reason in your future. Savannah, 3 months your junior, is even more head strong than you are! She is always game for any trouble you might lead her into and she is the most apt to hurt your feelings if she doesn’t want to play or hold your hand. The three of you are perfect friends and inseparable.

You have shown us, over the past year, so many facets of your personality. You are at once sensitive and brave. Your feelings are hurt by any perceived injustices – like when Savannah refuses to hold your hand – and yet you have no problem running headlong into any exciting adventure. When we were in San Diego in October, you tried your hand at skateboarding – all on your own – and didn’t shed a tear when you landed head first on the concrete. You ran right into the ocean over and over again despite being bowled over by the strong waves. Your Dad took you out into the surf on a boogie board and you LOVED it, making Mama shiver with your love of the unknown. Just a month ago, when we visited your Tia for her wedding in Indiana, you lost your balance and fell face-first into the deep end of the kiddie pool. I was terrified, but when I pulled your up out of the water, you looked at me with a huge grin on your face and said, “I swimming, Mama!” I think that sums up the juxtaposition that is uniquely your personality. You are a just little boy who thinks things in this world should be fair and are crushed when they aren’t. At the same time, nothing scares you much and you will try anything – from eating sushi at Mikuni’s to horsebackriding to climbing up to the highest slide on the playground (you know, the one for the “big” kids) without looking back.

In the past year, you have gone from being unbalanced and tentative as you walked across the living room to running across the park so fast that I cannot catch up with you. You were always good at kicking a soccer ball but now you can run toward it and kick it “on the fly”. You have gone from pushing your little John Deere tractor to riding the tricycles at school on your own. You now love putting your head to the floor, trying to do somersaults without assistance. You’re not quite there yet but I know it will be any day now that you gleefully make it over your head and land sitting on the floor, filled with delight and accomplishment. In November, we “ran” the Toddler Dash at the Turkey Trot in Davis and you toddled along slowly, holding my hand. I cannot wait until next year when you can run along side your peers even though I will miss walking slowly by you side holding hands.

One year ago you were babbling a word hear and there, still calling all of the women in your world, “Mama” and now you can say so many sentences that I can’t keep track of them all. I remember distinctly one of your first complete sentences. You walked into the dining room from your bedroom, looked up at me and said, “I need shoes, Mama.” I couldn’t believe my ears! One minute you were barely uttering one word at a time and the next minute you’d figured out sentences! Since then you have become more opinionated every day and use the phrase, “my turn” whenever you’d like to take over whatever Mama or Dada are doing.

You’ve fallen in love with the entire animal kingdom, both wild and domestic, thriving and extinct. You’ve always loved Baxter, Johnny and June but your love has grown over the past year and you lovingly call them all by name. One of your biggest frustrations is that Baxter won’t always play with you and you take if very personally when he is not in the mood to play. Your favorite dog by far, though is a yellow lab named Lola. She belongs to our friend Sandy and she will play with you gently but incessantly for hours. When she plays tug-of-war with you, you laugh and laugh. She never tires of playing like Baxter does. You also love Wendy and Martin’s dog, Jack, who doesn’t play but is a total cuddle bug and loves nothing more than to be hugged all day long. You’ve always been a big fan of the horses but your love and knowledge have grown over the past year so much that you’ve known the difference between a horse and pony since the beginning of the Summer. Your not intimidated by their size in the slightest and will walk right up to Eclipse to brush his legs. You also love dinosaurs and love to hear, “How does a dinosaur say goodnight?” over and over again at bedtime. You never cease looking for cows or deer on the side of the road when we’re on road trips and will chant, “mo dee or mo cow,” over and over again once you’ve spotted one.

Possibly your two favorite pastimes are playing music and playing ball and that would be ANY kind of music and ANY game that involves a ball. Your Nana showed you how to play the harmonica and you caught on immediately! Since then you’ve been great at playing the harmonica, the guitar, drums, really any instrument you can get your hands on. Your cousin Lucy is a pianist and music teacher and you discovered the piano at her house when we visited Corvallis after Christmas. You were so thoughtful as you explored the keys, listening to each note before moving on to the next. We like to go to Southside Park on Tuesday nights to watch the Aztec dancers dance and play drums. One evening you and Jacob joined their circle! You both watched the dancers feet carefully to imitate their moves. Dancing at your Tia Ellen’s wedding and at Carnaval were two of your grandest moments. Of, how you love dancing with your cousins, especially Elise and Ashley! As for balls, well, you’ve spent the last year loving basketball, baseball and soccer. You have a wagon full of balls of all shapes and sizes and you play with them EVERY day, no joke.

Last year you’d only seen snow for a brief afternoon but this year you had two trips, one to Oregon and one to Bear Valley, where you got to spend lots of quality time playing in the snow. We visited Chito and Grammy DiDi after Christmas during a rash of snow storms and got to march around making snow balls and snow angels. A few months later we spent the weekend in Bear Valley with Meera and Matt and did lots of sledding and snow shoeing. You loved the cold but were a little intimidated by the sledding. You were never more content than when you’d fall asleep all bundled up on Dada’s back in the Ergo while we were snow shoeing.

This year has been full of times spent with people who love you. Many of them you’d spent lots of time with last year but this year you’ve realized that they are “your people”. You love going to visit your Abuelo and Abuela, watching out the window for Nana, talking to Grandpa on the phone and visiting with Tia Ellen and Tio Matvei on Skype. You are never more happy than when visiting Tia Maria and Tia Maritza because they never tire of playing with you, You recognize your Grandpa Jim on the phone and go to the refrigerator to get his picture whenever we talk about him. You visited with Will and Max and all of your cousins at Tia’s wedding and had a grand time being “one of the gang” and totally ditching the grownups. Your two favorite “big kids” in all the world are Ashley and Josie and whenever you see a picture of an older girl in one of your books you call her one of the two. You know all of the names of the teachers and kids at your school and even “tattle” when someone has wronged you. We discovered this by accident when I asked you who had bitten you (I was actually asking about mosquito bites) and you straightforwardly answered that one your classmates (who shall remain nameless) bit you.

You seem to be looking forward to the arrival of your brother and are constantly covering my belly with a blanket for the baby. You sweetly bring your baby toys to my tummy for the baby to play with and think that you have a baby in your tummy as well. A few weeks ago you told me very seriously, ” I want baby come out now…” (Some days, I couldn’t agree more.) I know you are going to be the best big brother in the whole world.

You’ve probably had as many “firsts” this year as last: you made your first best friends, Jacob and Savannah, you saw your fist movie in the theater, sled down your first hill, jumped into the swimming pool, rode a tricycle, decorated the Christmas tree, learned to brush your teeth, flew your first kite, built your first sandcastle (and destroyed it), and many more. Mama and Dada have had a fantastic time learning and growing with you every day this year. We can’t believe how far we’ve all come! I can’t wait to spend the next year with you, Dada and baby Enzo. You are the most important people in my world.

I love you with all my heart. Always.

Love,

Mama

So, tonight we decided (albeit very last minute) to go to the tuesday night practice that some Aztec dancers hold at Southside Park… It was great! We invited Diego’s friends and Jacob and him just danced their hearts out, and yes, we missed Savanna!…

cool to see, cool to film (see my version of the events with the video below…)

Dear Friends and Family,

Life has been busy for us lately. We haven’t posted much because we have been living like there is no tomorrow; but it has been all great as Diego continues to grow into his own. He looks more and more like a mix of both Bets and I. We took a trip recently to see our friends in Texas and had a blast… it was fantastic to see them and take Diego to them; he still wants to see Josie everyday! our friends were (as always) the best anyone would wish to have!

We have a trip coming up to Indiana for Tia Ellen’s wedding and of course we have a couple of short trips coming up in July and August and October… As you can see, having Diego has added to our social life; but the best part of it all is that Diego loves traveling and meeting new people so it is incredibly satisfying to be busy.

A couple of days ago Bets shared a blog posting with me about new baby and older sister and how hard it can be for both the mom and kid(s) and I realized that I MAY NOT BE PREPARED for the emotional roller coaster that having a new kid will be for our little Diego. Up until now (on the onset of his second birthday) he has been our world, and everything we do and plan and our lifestyle is centered around him. This is what I told Betsy:

It will be different for him, maybe a bit harder or maybe not… no one ever knows. All we can do is hug him, kiss him and tell him we will always love him. He will need us more than ever, and we will be there for him. Please, know that I will do everything possible to be there for him and Enzo at the same time, Diego may need us more than ever, but I am sure he will adjust beautifully. We have to instill in him love for his brother while at the same time love him as well… that’s some of what we can do; I am sure we will think of other things to help him cope…

The question is: will I be able to do it without a major emotional breakdown? I hope so, I want to be there for my kids and hope to be strong enough to be supportive for all: My lovely wife, Diego and Enzo.

So, yes, he will be a baby boy and his name will be Lorenzo Javier; shortened to Enzo… enough said.

We continue to build fantastic bonds with other parents with children close to Diego’s age and have come to realize how wonderful life is to grow up with people close to you, so we want to say to Stephanie, Gordon and Savanna (Vanie); Jennifer, Tim and Jacob; Stacy, Scott and Kyan: Thanks for being in our kid’s life.

Lastly, our wedding anniversary is coming up next week, and frankly I am at a lost for what to do for Bets; I love her even more every day and am glad to have married her. It was the best decision I have ever made in my life. It is not that I can’t think of anything to give her or anywhere to take her out; but the truth is that nothing I could do will ever convey how much I love her so I feel that giving her anything that doesn’t truly reflect the depth of feelings I have for her is not enough… any ideas? (feel free to post on my Facebook page if you do!)

Thanks friends, family and the occasional lurker for reading… writing this has cleared my head, giving a feeling of accomplishment and most importantly it has made me look forward to lifetime with my family….

We have updated our Photo Gallery and if you need to download them, they are available in flickr.

A few portraits of Diego with his friends!

Since returning from our amazing trip in Oregon and Washington (that I’m sure you all read about in Marco’s posts), we have been ravaged by a continuous onslaught of evil and I mean EVIL viruses that have undoubtedly come from Diego’s daycare. It began with our first day back at “school” (as we like to call it). Before we had even entered the front door, one of the mothers stopped us to tell us about the 72 hour stomach flu that had knocked out just about every family at one time or another during our absence. Unphased (yet), we walked on only to be assaulted with horror stories by a Dad in the foyer and another Mom in the 2 year old room. Marco and I stopped at that point, bent our heads together and had a quiet parent-parent conference. Should we leave our healthy son to this? Marco was leaving for Mac World that following day and I would be solo parenting for 4 days in his absence. Could I cope with 72 hours of vomiting and diarrhea by myself, knowing that I likely would succumb to the virus soon after Diego did? Did we want to risk it? It sounded from the stories like most of the young children had already had the virus and recovered so we decided to keep Diego home one more day and hope that somehow we could avoid it. Tuesday came and went – no sign of sickness. Wednesday morning was still very promising. Wednesday night Diego spiked a fever and threw up once but then seemed fine – had we dodged the bullet? Diego wasn’t eating much in the evening – but this might just be picky eating, right? Thursday and Friday day – uneventful…. At this point I was feeling positively giddy. We might just have make it! I am usually religious and slightly obsessed with reading Diego’s little progress note at the end of every day at daycare but this Friday evening was special and I neglected to even glance at the sheet. We were off to San Francisco to meet Daddy and spend a family day in the city. I was REALLY looking forward to it. San Francisco is one of my favorite cities and we had not spent any time there since Marco and I first began dating.

As I drove west on I-80, I marveled at how little traffic there was. I was cruising at 65 mph with no slowdowns, not even in Fairfield! I kept passing the signs that said it would still take me 90 then 69 minutes to downtown but I didn’t believe it, traffic was flying! Until…… Berkeley. All of a sudden 65 mph turned into 5 mph, then 3 mph. It took me 1 hour to drive from Berkeley to the Marriott at the convention center. Did I mention that I hadn’t stopped for dinner because Diego fell asleep around Davis? Well, he woke up when we got to Berkeley and I had been passing crackers and raisins and grapes to the backseat for eons and he was getting cranky. We finally made it to the hotel at 7:45 (left Sac at 5:15) and scurried down to a nearby Mexican restaurant to get some food in Diego. Did he eat? Of course not and wouldn’t even sit in his highchair for a minute. Marco and I ended up trading off – one eating hurriedly while the other ran around the courtyard with Diego. This was NOT how I envisioned our 24 hour mini vacation in the city. Back at the hotel we gave Diego his bath and put him to bed. Miraculously, he slept all night despite being in the Pack ‘n’ Play. The morning, however, was not so sunny. Diego had profuse diarrhea and was clutching his stomach and crying unconsolably. Although we had an impressive arsenal of pediatric medicinals in the diaper bag, none were GI appropriate and he was only getting worse. At this point it was only 6am. What could we do now? The only thing that might give him so relief was gripe water and Whole Foods didn’t open for another hour. Should we hightail it for home! Crap! (No pun intended, seriously…) We elected to pick up some coffee at Peet’s, wait for Whole Foods to open, buy some gripe water and then head back home. I was feeling not-so-great myself and was at that point where I needed to eat something NOW or I was going to be following in Diego’s footsteps.

I’ll spare you the details beyond saying that it took Diego 72 hours me slightly over 24 hours to recover.

Three days later Marco came down with a cough and cold. Two days later Diego woke up with pink eye. Two days after that I drove up to Tahoe to speak at the Lake Tahoe Equine Conference (talk was great fun and enjoyed my less-than-24-hours there). While I was in Tahoe, Diego was coughing like crazy, wheezing and spiking low grade fevers. Next day we took him in and he was given nebulized albuterol (for those of you who haven’t had the pleasure – that’s tantamount to waterboarding if you are an 18 month old) and he was diagnosed with RSV (respiratory syncytial virus) via throat swab (also torture though less traumatic since overwith so quickly). Next day (yesterday) Marco wakes up with his eyes glued shut – more pinkeye-I wake up with a sore throat and congestion, and Diego’s pinkeye recrudesces. Seriously?

If you are wondering when it gets better – not to fear – Diego is no longer wheezing and Marco’s eyes are slightly less red and swollen. I haven’t given Diego any Albuterol for 12 hours so he is actually taking a nap! (Toddlers on albuterol are WIRED, BTW). We are determined to re-enter the land-of–the-living today no matter what. Some how we have managed to maintain some semblance of good humor despite our exhaustion and are looking forward to a healthy week ahead.

Oh yeah, and Diego’s getting his second set of tubes in his ears after 2 nearly back-to-back ear infections amidst the rest of this crap. (I’m pretty sure Diego can say “crap” now along with “dude” and some other aberrations of the English and Spanish languages). Lovely.

-by Betsy